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June 2, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Don’t Let Assholes Determine Your Worth

Dear Down Trodden Cashier, Stepping out of your comfort zone and trying new things is stressful and scary. Quite honestly, you looked like a deer in headlights that could only say two word: "I'm sorry." You looked frazzled and completely out of your element which showed in your lack of confidence and overly apologetic manner. Pushy customers wanting you to bend the rules because of their own selfishness and ignorance didn't help the situation at all. I know you were just filling while someone was away, but what if you hadn't been? What if this had been your first week in a brand new job that you really wanted to get good at? Too often we forget that we have a role to play in the success of those around us. Too often we push to get our way without considering what our selfishness may be doing to the confidence of those who are serving. We all make mistakes. It's how we learn. Yet our current cutlure doesn't accept any level of failure as an option. We don't care that it's your first day. You'd better be perfect. Don't ever apologize for learning. Don't ever give up because some asshole thinks he is better than you. -Dave
Filed Under: Culture Tagged With: , ,
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June 2, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Jack Frost vs. Your Destiny

Dear Spring Wishers, Yesterday there was snow on the ground at my house. I was pissed. Not because I hate snow but because the snow seems to slow Spring's momentum down. Every time it feels like Winter has finally left for the year, she turns around and gives me the finger in the form of a snowflake covered lawn. I gumble. I complain. I do nothing but wait until the damn snow melts. But not you. On the very same day, you and your friend were out jogging as if to say "Screw you Jack Frost. I'm going for a run." I find that about myself; if things don't go exactly right, I get irritated and angry while sitting on my ass waiting for things to get better. I wonder how many people around me do the same? I'm learning to fight and take control of my destiny, deciding what it will actually be as opposed to letting destiny decide for me. No more waiting for Spring to come. Like you, I will decide to act as if Winter never happened. Thank you. -Dave
Filed Under: Decisions Tagged With: , ,
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Do You Hide When It Rains?

Dear Storm Trooper, It happened in the blink of an eye. From my perch in the 4th floor cafe of my office building I could see you coming from a mile away, sauntering easily down the sidewalk in the sunshine on this coolish spring day. I placed my coffee cup under the cappuccino machine and watched it brew. When I looked up, the sky hadgreyed and the downpour had started. As you briefly stepped under the shelter of the overpass to assess the situation you realized there was only one thing to do. In one quick movement you were back on the sidewalk, head up, walking with firm deliberate steps. Not running. Not hiding. You knew that in order to complete your journey, you would simply have to weather the storm. Too often, many of us find ourselves in similar situations. Life is good, the sun is shining. Then the storm hits. Our tendency is to step under the overpass, until it passes. We hide. But not you. You stepped out, head held high and pressed on. I will strive to do the same. -Dave
Filed Under: Journey Tagged With: ,
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Die Before Living vs. Live Before Dying

Dear Tube Dependant Driver, It bothers me that I see you through the lens of a tube. I'm not sure why. It makes no sense why something that small would scew my view of you in such a monumental way. I apologize if it seemed like I was staring while we both sat motionless at the red light. I suppose the little clear oxygen tube that trailed from your nostrils around your ear contrasted by your 20 year old face is what threw me off. By default I assume you're dying: probably in a few days. I'm not sure why I go there, but I do. Due to my ignorant pity that was born out of illicit supposition, I found myself wondering how you're living your life. Knowing you're gonna die tomorrow (which seemed the most likely option), what are your priorities; what are you fighting to change today. I'm not dying tomorrow and will most likely live for quite some time. So why is it I'm not doing something life changing? Why is it that so many of us would change what we're doing and how we're living if we knew we were going to die tomorrow? Why not live while we still have life to live? -Dave
Filed Under: Life Tagged With: , ,
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The Strength In Vulnerability

Dear Secret Sharers, I admire your courage. Last night, you all walked up to the microphone and told us your secrets - the shameful ones, the ones that hurt you, the ones you still cried over even though they happened years ago. You broke down. Vulnerable. And yet, there was so much strength in your vulnerability. There's something about sharing your secrets with a room full of strangers that connects everyone. Because we've all been in those places, lonely, uncertain, self-conscious, self-hating. And when you shared your secrets, it was like a collective burden lifted. So for your courage... thank you. - Heidi
Filed Under: Contributed Tagged With: ,
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June 2, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Efficiency vs Creativity

Dear Cultural Matriarch, I never expected to have the 2 minute conversation about the push for perfection that our culture has forced on us in recent decades, yet that's exactly where I found myself. With your chin almost resting on my shoulder, you were standing uncomfortably close as your grandson clung to your side. Your assessment of how we illicitly evaluate and reward or punish based on efficiency was spot on. It seems like our factory mentality hastrained us to simply follow the rules and we'll be fine; as if those who wrote those rules think we're idiots who are incapable of an innovative idea. The "failure is not an option" mentallity is what kills creativity and innovation. Keep telling yoru grandson to imagine and create. Keep telling your him to be the best he can be; to not be afraid to fail. He will be great and it will be a result of the solid support the grandmother I met while waiting for my coffee. -Dave
Filed Under: Culture Tagged With: , ,
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Pssst….I Envy Your Balls (That’s Right; You Heard Me)

Today’s letter goes out to my good friend (and now author) Sam McLoughlin (@VancouverSam).

Dear Teetering Wordsmith, I like your balls, sir. As awkward and uncomfortable as you feel right now, squirming in your seat as another man covets your sacred stones, it's true. A few years ago you had an idea and you went for it; you started. Now you are teetering on the verge of becoming a published author. Far too many of us waste our time sitting in front of computer screens wishing we could impact things; change things. We justify our lackadaisical attitudes by telling ourselves that we'll start tomorrow or that we just haven't had the right idea yet. The problem is, we never even write our ideas down in the hopes that maybe they'll stick tomorrow or the next day or the next. We continue to push buttons and our Sims to work while checking our Twitter feeds. We grabbing opportunities and kicking them in the face with our genius. But not you. You went on a cruise, hung out with the CEO of a major publisher, and decided floating through life was not an option. Many of us are still in the shallow end with our water-wings on. Here's hoping you tip. -Dave
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No Way! A F*****G iPad 2!?

Dear iPad Greeter, Generally when you run into someone you know, the standard greetings are: "Hey", "How's it going?", or "What's up?". "I just bought an iPad 2!" while holding up your Future Shop bag is generally not what you'd expect to hear first when you bump into an acquaintance. At first I thought it was rather odd and even a bit selfish, as if you were rubbing it in the guy's face that you had an extra grand to spend on your new toy. What I realized after creepily watching you and eavesdropping from a rather unsafe distance was that it wasn't about showing off or telling your friend how cool you are. Rather, it was you expressing your excitement about something you've probably been anticipating for quite some time. You cut through the usual bullshit of the "Hi, how are you" and cut straight to "I'm super excited about this!". I think there's something we can all learn from your simple exchange: there is no right way to greet someone when you truly have something genuine to share with them. -Dave
Filed Under: Anticipation Tagged With: ,
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Two Hand Are Better Than One

Dear Double Clasp Handshaker, There was something overtly genuine as you firmly enclosed your friend's hand between the two of yours, all the while looking him in the eye. It was as if his departure was going to be the worst part of your day. You were engrossed in the moment, wanting to hang on to those last few moments. You weren't thinking about what you had for dinner, or wondering if you remembered to set your PVR to tape American Idol. You weren't thinking about the iPad 2 you were going to buy the next day, or the sea of 140 character updates you had just missed. You were present. We get so lost these days in the lightning fast world we live that we often miss the things that actually make us tick; that actually encourage us and push on to being brilliant. We blow past the opportunities to spend time with great people. We don't hear the encouraging word that was muttered while our iPods are playing. We miss the significance of a double clasped handshake. -Dave
Filed Under: Community Tagged With: , ,
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June 2, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Reality of My Longings (Validation = Bullshit)

Dear Incompetent Validator, You are frustratingly impossible to deal with. Your incoherent silence is maddening. You anger me. I find myself looking for you every few minutes but you never show up. You are totally unreliable. Yet I depend on you. I need you. Why don't you come when I beckon? Why don't you listen when I call? There have been many before you who are almost long forgotten. But you already know that don't you. That's why you never show. You already know that once you entertain my vices, you will quickly be stepped over as I move on in search of the next source of validation. That's why you'll never come: because deep down inside I know you won't be good enough. -Dave
Filed Under: Validation Tagged With: ,
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